Games / Game Reviews

Elite Beat Agents

By Josh Hechinger
December 11, 2006 - 12:19

Let’s do the time warp: it’s 1997, and the demo disc containing PaRappa the Rapper is spinning in my Playstation (that’d be the first one, back when we all wore loincloths and hunted dinosaurs for food). A paper cut out of a hip-hop is busting rhymes with a kung fu onion on my TV. It’s quirky, it’s funky, it’s colorful, but most importantly, it’s the first time I’ve ever played a Japanese rhythm game. A game where music was the focus and hitting beats was the gameplay? It blew my 10-year-old mind.

Nine years later, Elite Beat Agents for the Nintendo DS just knocked the socks off the exact same section of my gray matter.

The titular agents are musical men-in-black that essentially form a cheering section for people who find themselves in some sort of trouble. Are you a director having trouble with a film that will make or break your career? The EBA will groove you to cinematic gold. Are you a babysitter trying to watch some rugrats and have a meaningful conversation with your boyfriend at the same time? They’ll bust a move for your success.

Each level features a different scenario, where an everyday person finds themselves in some sort of adversity. One scream of “HELLLLLLLP!” to the heavens later and the agents arrive on the scene to boogie down in a helpful manner. The scenarios play out on the DS’ dual screens like comic book pages with goofy, Anime-esque art. After the problem in each scenario is laid out, the agents arrive, and a song starts up. Then you’re on, tapping dots on the screen with the DS’ stylus in rhythm to the music. The scenario gets better or worse for the character depending on how well you keep the beat.

And that’s it. Tapping dots on a screen. That’s the whole game right there. On the face of it, not exactly the be-all end-all of interactive gameplay experiences. I wouldn’t even like half the artists if I met them on the street; Ashley Simpson and Avril Lavigne are on there, for crying out loud, singers who are guaranteed to make me switch stations as fast as I can.

And yet…I can’t put the game down. It may just be tapping dots on a screen, but makes for a surprisingly addicting gaming experience. I even find myself enjoying the aforementioned singers’ levels, not to mention hits like Brian Setzer’s “Rock This Town” and The Rolling Stones’ “Jumpin’ Jack Flash”.

A game has to have some seriously powerful mojo if it can make me like blatantly manufactured teenage girl punk rock. Elite Beat Agents has that mojo.

Which isn’t to say the game doesn’t have a few flaws here and there. The agents are rendered in 3D graphics during their dancing sequences, which slightly clashes with the rest of the game’s Anime aesthetic.

Another downside to the game is the way some songs translate across modes. Certain fast songs feel clunky on the easier modes, while some of the slower songs feel like busy work on the more complicated modes.

That said, ‘mastering’ each song brings the replay value up to faintly ridiculous levels. On the harder songs/modes, the trick becomes to replay songs over and over again, mastering the different sections until you can put it all together and pass the level.

Additionally, Elite Beat Agents is a sort of “remix” of the Japanese game Osu! Tatakae! Ouendan. Rather than attempt to translate that game’s heavy references to Japanese pop culture, developer iNiS simply took the game’s mechanics and fashioned an entirely new game around it. EBA is available at most video game stores, such as EB, as well as mass market stores such as Wal-Mart and Big K. O!T!O Is available from most Japanese import websites.

Last Updated: November 29, 2025 - 16:51