Van Wilder: The Rise of Taj

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Van Wilder: The Rise of Taj
By Tony Farinella
March 30, 2007 - 23:11

Writer: David Drew Gallagher(written by)
Brent Goldberg (characters) &
David Wagner(characters)
Director: Mort Nathan
Starring: Kal Penn and Lauren Cohan
97 min Comedy 2006
MPAA: Rated R for pervasive crude sexual content, some nudity and language.

It's amazing what seeing a film on DVD can do to open up your eyes. I saw this same exact film back in December of 2006. It was a boring and snowy night in Chicago. Because of this, I was looking for a film that required as little thought as possible. I just wanted to get out of the house and have some fun. I decided to check out "Van Wilder: The Rise of Taj." I thought the film would provide me with two hours of mindless gags and entertainment. Even if it didn't, I thought it might be so bad that it's good. One of those films you see at Midnight with a group of weirdos and creepos. You mostly go to enjoy the audience and the nonsense that might come out of their mouth. After viewing the film, I decided it was mildly amusing and comical. I had fun with the crowd and the atmosphere. Sadly, the crazy crowd was not present in my house for this DVD viewing. I only wish I could have found them and invited them over to view the movie.

To be fair, I didn't see the first "Van Wilder" film. Any film that features Tara Reid and Ryan Reynolds is not high on my "must view" list. For all I know, the first film could have been worthwhile. I think I can sleep well despite the fact I never viewed the original. Our film opens up following Taj and his entry into Camford University in England. Taj is played by Kal Penn, who a lot of you might remember from the very funny "Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle." Sadly, all of his slacker charm is missing in this film. He starts off the film with this horrible and cheesy accent. Needless to say, it's not on the level of Dustin Hoffman in "Tootsie" or Meryl Streep in "Sophie’s Choice" in terms of famous movie accents. Upon arriving at college, he finds out that his acceptance letter was not an acceptance letter. Because of this, he can't stay in the dorms. He's stuck with a group of nerds in a ragged house. This sounds familiar. Oh, yeah, it's the same exact storyline from " Revenge of the Nerds."

I suppose it's my film critic duty to describe some of these nerds. They have such interesting and well-developed character traits. First, we meet the very awkward, very skinny, and very nerdy Gethin. He can best be described as an anorexic Harry Potter. Secondly, we meet Seamus, who loves to drink and play rugby. He spends a good portion of the film head-butting individuals. Thirdly, we have Simon, who spends a good portion of the film in silence. The film explains later on why he's so quiet. Needless to say, it's a real plot-twist. Lastly, we meet Sadie, who has big boobs and loves to give out blow jobs. Taj does his best to give all of them confidence and self-esteem. He wants them to revolt against the group of men who threw them in this house. Taj also pursues the girlfriend of Pipp Everett, who is responsible for their current state. Taj and his group of misfits challenge Pipp's group to a series of cheesy and corny events. You might remember this plot twist from " Revenge of the Nerds."

Now, before you call me prude and dull, hear me out. I love a film that is raunchy, rude, and sexy. One of my favorite films from 2005 was "The 40 Year Old Virgin." In order for that style to work, you need interesting and funny characters. "Van Wilder: The Rise of Taj" features cartoon characters. The characters in this film exist only in the minds of the screenwriters. I didn't believe for one second that the characters in this film would ever show up in the real world. Also, the film tries way too hard to be funny and over-the-top. The film is the movie equivalent of a group of thirteen-year-old boys exchanging dirty jokes in a gym locker room. Any film that uses the term "muff-munching" is not aiming very high. Was I offended by this film? Not at all. I was bored during this film. And as you all know, nothing is worse than being bored at the movies. In the end, "Van Wider: The Rise of Taj" is forgettable, boring, and unnecessary.

Special Features: The first feature on the DVD is a feature entitled "Union Jack Offs." This runs at nine minutes and discusses the making of the film. We hear from just about everyone who participated in the movie. The DVD also features two music videos. We also get seven deleted scenes that total seven minutes. A gag reel is also featured that runs at three minutes. Lastly, we fellow Kal Penn in a feature that runs at four minutes. He gives us a tour around the "The Barn."

Final Thoughts: The "American Pie" franchise was successful because it featured likable and funny characters. "Van Wilder: The Rise of Taj" features none of the above. You need to have likable and interesting characters if you are going to make a gross-out film. If not, we don't want to spend any time with the characters at all. I can't think of one good reason for you to seek out this film. The film does feature nudity, but so what? You can check that out on any Internet website.

Grade: D